Well I haven't updated in the longest time. But I've decided that I need to fill up this blog with narcissistic ramblings of life and love and that to come.

It frustrates me to no end how we are such an ANNOYING race, and I say race but I don't mean Chinese. I don't even mean Asian. I mean the whole damn human race. cause that's just what we are ; human. We know this of course, we acknowledge how annoying we are. We tell each other about each others' bad habits, fickle-mindedness, assholic instincts and of course, the very real potential to hurt. Yet. We remain so full ourselves, we dare to flaunt our faults in so many different forms. I watched a beautiful video for the millionth time today. It shows two people, so insanely in love with each other, the thought of each other, the taste of each other, the smell of each other. and i bet, that everybody else who watched that video, forgot their cynicism for a second, and wished that there was somebody out there who would love them to that extent. But then reality kicks in, we are enlightened. we know that we were the ones directing the video, we were the ones who wrote the lines that spawned in our lonely minds, who taught the actors how to act out a scene of love despair and yearning for which we ourselves yearn for.

I hate how we are so proud of how we are so lacking.

There must be a reason why we have to broadcast this. There must be a reason why I'm doing the exact thing I'm complaining about.

I wish for simplicity. I wish to be a brick in a big brick wall. To watch the people who pass me daily. I will feel solid. strong. surrounded. And I hope to one day have my eyes covered by a shade of eggshell. To live blindly for a bit. To eventually be seperated from the other bricks around me. and to be dropped into the bottom of the sea tied to an ugly criminal's wrists. Contradict my former wish, and be a pretty interesting brick. I'm so tired and my ramblings do not make sense. They jump around the page like how I am always unable to concentrate on one thing for long, like how I am always unable to connect my thoughts in my teensy weensy brain.

hi, here's a picture of bricky goodness to bring our minds back to. this?

and you should, you should
have given me wings by now
so I could catch your eye